Hi Louise; sorry to hear youé still have problems. Third time lucky EH! cheers Vera

Hey, Louise!

It's no wonder you are feeling 'bummed out' right now. I haven't kept up with posts in LE these past few weeks and after your first surgery seeming to be successful, I had hoped you were still doing well... alot I know, huh?
I clearly remember the pre and post physical and emotional trauma of my own enucleation all too well ...so reading you are about to go through this yet a third time rips my heart out for you. I am so amazed by your strength and endurance. You are evidently surrounded and filled with love in your life for support through this incredible journey. I will be thinking about you all day today and sending my hopeful wishes that your strength and optimism be a snug blanket for your heart.
Each of us here in LE have our own unique experience in becoming and dealing with monocularism. I have never heard anyone say: Looky everybody! I just lost my eye and it didn't bother me a bit! On the contrary, it is one of the greatest heartbreaks that we do and can survive. Survival and adjustment to this trauma of only having the ONE enucleation has made me a stronger, deeper, more compassionate person. It is my thought that when you finally get the most compatible implant this third time...and you heal up...again... you're gonna be as close to a saint in your soul as any living human can get. If my prayers and tears for your success and recovery were as effective for you as they are intense for my heart....you would be leaping tall buildings this very moment.
Biggest hugs,
~~Kathy
cannon40

This is for Kathy(cannon40),
How did they decide to do an enacleation versa an evisceration? Sometimes I wonder if they would of taken the whole eye in stead of just the global part this nightmare would be over. I ask my Dr. and all I got is we thought this was the best way for you. I am ready to yell uncle!!!
Louise in Pa.

You know what, Louise?
I believe that evisceration probably would not have worked for me given the condition of my entire eye. As part of my first surgery to repair the detached retina, the surgeon installed a 'scleral buckle' around the circumference of my eyeball in which I believe the purpose of that is to gently put pressure on the vitreous to hold the retina repair in place while it heals from the surgery. This is a very common procedure used in the retina reattachment after doing the lasering part. At the time, I had no idea this was part of the method, having not done any pre-research on it. I mean, after all, one does not reallly have time to ask a bunch of questions once the retina is detached...you just hit the surgical suite as fast as possible to try to stop impending blindness, right? Well.....that worked out really great for about a year. THEN my eye started getting red and inflammed to the point that eyedrops offered no relief. Upon examination, the OpthDoc said my scleral buckle had become "exposed". Said that if I didn't get it removed, infection was inevitable. Turns out the buckle is not a solid piece of material but is a line of silicone oil injected someway around the eye. I was that 1 in 10,000 people the exposure problem happens to. (My Luck)
The buckle removal apparently was not totally successful (the retina detached again and again) and oil started leaking out and pooling in the front of my eye. Repeated trips to have the bubbles of it lanced were fruitless and the pain was horrendous every waking moment. It is my thought that due to the inflammation caused by the buckle, my eyeball structure integrity was not salvageable by the time I gave in and decided to be rid of the pain. I saw THREE surgeons before it happened. The primary one said right off that it would be an enucleation but he did not use the type of special implant I was preferring after my research about implants. (As a former surgical scrub tech, I had read every step of every procedure in the online medical journals.) The OpthDoc he referred me to did not have any openings for non-trauma/cancer surgeries for over a month. Soooo...this second guy referred me to yet another (Dr. Marc Shields, Stanton, VA) who was very experienced with the Medpour implantation procedure. With this porous type implant, the lateral and medial muscles are retained and looped into the device for movement of the implant after sutures heal. I was such a looney by that time, as they were preparing me for the surgery I was insistant to know which method the surgeon planned to employ in closing my conjunctival flap and tenon's capsule...LOL! They were so anxious to get me gassed!
At any rate, that was on Sept 17th '09----- so far, I have been fortunate to have had no inflammation of the flap or exposure of the implant. The prosthetic is natural looking with just enough movement to be completely unnoticeable (at least since the positioning adjustment last month) to the general public or anyone unless I absolutely demonstrate to someone where the actual limits are to the movement.
I remember the post op pain of the enucleation as if it were yesterday and I don't think I will ever forget it. I wept yesterday at the thought you are about to face this for a third time. If your first surgeries involved only evisceration procedures, it may be enucleation will be the resolution of the pain once and for all. Hey, honey... I just want this part to be over for you so you can get on with a wonderful life in the post op world.... It's out here! It really is!
Love,
Kathy
cannon40

Hi Kathy,
I am having a new Dr. this time, but as far as I know they are going to do the same procedure again. Remove the implant and put in yet a smaller one. I was so upset when he told me it didn't work I failed to ask questions and my surgery was scheduled for Wed of this week.(13). The doctor that did the first two implants is going to be there also, he is relocating is the reason for the new Dr. My eye too was lost because of retina detachments but they did not use the buckle. He told me the schell would have to be thicker to fill the eye out. I just never realized how many people go thru this terrible ordeal. Thanks for the support. This web site has been my rock.
Louise in Pa.

Hello Louise,
I had a buckle, then it was 2 more to attach the retina, none of them worked, too much scar tissue.
I will be wishing all goes well for Wednesday.
Fondest, Maureen

Hi everyone,
Well made it thru yet another surgery, sixth one in eleven months. Have a huge patch over one side of my face. I am allowed to remove the patch myself on Tues, then I go back to Harrisburg (2 hour drive one way) on the following Mon. I just pray that this one takes, they did it a little different. They removed the implant from the front of the eye and sewed it shut. Opened the back of the eye and put in a new implant. I just want to move on with my life and put this behind me. Look normal again. The stares are starting to get to me. On the brighter side no pain, so that is a great plus.
Keep in touch,
Louise in Pa.

Hi Louise; thanks for the update. I sincerely hope this works for you and it is the end of your long(er) journey than most of us here. Continued healing and OH!! to be pain-free BIG bonus. Cheers Vera

Hi Louise!
I'm so happy you are on the other side of it! Hopefully the method used this time will prevent any future implant exposure complications. Will look forward to your "progress" posts and wish you all the smoothest of recoveries!

Peace~
~~Kathy
cannon40

Hi Louise,
I don't know how I've missed all your updates but I did. I did not realize what all you have been going through. I sure feel for you. You have been in a real storm. You must be a very strong person now, as that is what storms in our lives seem to do, make us or break us. You are in an hard race but you will win in the end. My heart sure feels for you. My eye surgeries were further apart, but I used to feel like it was a non ending trial. I had my eye finally removed and all pain and problems were gone. It seems strange to not be having eye doctor appointments except once a year now. The ocularist wants me to come in every 6 mo. to polish the prothesis.
Know that you are in my prayers today for good results this time. Take care, Trudy in Oregon

Hi Everyone,
At last great news!!! Went to the eye doctor on Friday, Feb. 19 and the eye is healing. I have two stitches that need to dissolve yet, but got the go ahead to get the schell made on March 11. I just can't wait. After one year of problems this is finally over and I will get to look normal again. Thanks everyone for your support and words of encouragement. You all were a blessing in my time of need.
Louise in Penna,

Such good news Louise after such a long time, so happy for you. You are going to look absolutely bloomin' lovely with the new prosthetic.
Maureen

Wonderful news, Louise!! I have had you on my mind often since this last surgery. It has been a really long road for you and I am so glad to hear resolution is at hand. Please post pics when you get your prosthetic and new smile!
Warmest,
~~Kathy
~~~cannon40

Thanks Willis, I don't know why other people are posting on here. I go on March 11 to get my schell made, can't wait.
I am like you they will get more reponse when they start their own space.
Louise in Pa.

Hi Everyone,
I am counting down the days, and I can hardly wait to get my schell on Thursday. Just can't come soon enough for me.
Louise in Pa. Only four more days to go.

YEAH Louise; great news at last. I hope you are happy with the New YOU when you look in the mirror.
Hi also Elaine; glad you found us.

cheers Vera

Hi Everyone,
I got my shell on Thursday and I thought it look great, but now after I am home the color looks more blue and I think it should be more to the green shade. The man that did it said my eye color is very hard to match. My eyes are between and blue, green and hazel. Do I go with this or see if he can change it? I know it is hard to answer without seeing it, but other people agree with me. Can they fix the color without making it all over again? It is so good to look normal but I just don't know about the color
Louise in Pa.